Waching daily Jan 1 2019

Hi Kelli here from FreebieFindingMom.com

And today I'm going to share with you another way that you can use your essential oils

so a lot of us use oils, you know for things like natural health remedies

So say for instance, you're having some head discomfort a lot of times

We'll grab a peppermint essential oil to help with that and put it across our forehead and on our temples and even under our nose

Sometimes we'll use oils if you're having difficulty sleeping and he'll use maybe lavender essential oil for that

Maybe you're having some you know stomach discomfort and then you'll use dye guys

So a lot of us will use oils for you know, like natural health remedies

We also will sometimes use oils for just diffusing because we like the smell of them and they make really beautiful

Blends you can also use your oils for like homemade Beauty recipes. Sometimes we'll make homemade cleaners with our essential oils

But today I'm going to show you how to use your essential oils in cooking. So not all of such oils

Can you use to cook or bake with but those oils from Young Living that are known as vitality oils?

you actually can so the one that we're going to use today is peppermint essential oil peppermint essential oil is

comes in the premium starter kit

So if you have your kit already you are good to go

If you need to get your kit yet you can do so via the link that's in this post

But the recipe we are making today that's going to use peppermint essential oil is a holiday inspired recipe it is peppermint

Puppy chow, you may have also heard of it'd be called like peppermint muddy buddies, but honestly, whatever you call it

It is just all kinds of delicious. It is so good

so what you're gonna need to make this peppermint puppy chow or peppermint muddy buddies recipe is just

You'll need about 12 ounces of either like a white almond bark or just today. I'm using just white chocolate wafers here

You'll also need 12 ounces of rice Chex cereal. You will also need 1 cup of your powdered sugar

You'll need a half of a cup of crushed peppermint. And then of course your peppermint essential oil

So let's go ahead and get started now pan the camera down here so you can see everything

I'm doing the first thing I want to go ahead

I'm going to melt our white chocolate wafers in the microwave over here and about 30-second increments. So I'll be right back

I'm gonna pop this in the microwave

All right, I'll try to keep an eye on the white chocolate

but while

That is melting over there the microwave

I'll just share with you a few other recipes that you can make with your peppermint essential oil

but there's so many that you actually could make

I'm working on a peppermint cookies recipe that I hope to get up here on the blog in the next week

Another thing that you could make with your peppermint essential oil is like a peppermint bark

So I'll have a recipe for the peppermint bark up here on freeview finding mom in a week as well

You'll also you can let me started here in a second. You could also just add it to your coffee or your tea

All right, let's stop

So you can add it to your coffee or your tea as well

I also love peppermint ice cream

So you can use your peppermint essential oil in your ice cream as well when you make homemade ice cream

You can also use it for like peppermint brownies are really good, too

I will tell you whenever you're using any sort of essential oil in your ingredients as an ingredient

Always start with the lesser amount because it is highly when you use Young Living Essential Oils. They're really highly concentrated

So it's gonna be a very strong taste of peppermint

So what I will tell you for this recipe, you'll need about three to five drops of essential oil

So I would say start with three drops

You can always add more

But try three drops taste it see what you think that you can always add a couple more if you want it a little bit

More a little stronger peppermint taste in there. So let's just check our chocolate. I'll be right back

It's coming along so what I will say also about this recipe is I'll do all the mixing in the bowl today

but a hack when you make any sort of money buddies or a puppy chow is

To use a freezer bag when you're making this a lot of times when I make this recipe, I'll make it with myself

And so just to keep containing the mess. We'll use a freezer bag

And then that's a great way to kind of just incorporate everything quickly and easily by just letting him shake, you know

The freezer bag, but today I'll just keep it in the bowl

But little hack is to use a freezer bag when you make this recipe

It just makes it a lot easier

especially if you're right and having little ones help you but like I say

We're melting your chocolate right now then have to eat our chocolate melted

What we will do is we will add our essential oil. Like I said, you're going to start with three drops

You may go up to five but you'll start with three also

It's something to note is when you're crushing your peppermint for this recipe

You'll need a half of a cup that ended up

I think I crushed sixth candy canes

But I probably would have been okay with about five

So I would say about five to six candy canes makes about a half of a cup of your crushed peppermint

All right. Let me start my chocolate one more time

All right, so I will pan down here so you can see our chocolate it's nicely melted I try not to drop the camera

There we go. Let me try to block the sunlight the best I can so then you can see it better

All right, so we just melted our chocolate here

Which was like I said, it was 12 ounces. I just use wafers

But um, you can also use like I say a white almond bark if you want to as well

Here's our peppermint essential oil again start with three drops. You can always add more if you need to

There's our three drops of peppermint oil

It smells so good. I love peppermint. So we've added that. Oh, it smells so good

Okay

We added our peppermint essential oil to our white chocolate wafers that have been melted

Next we're going to quickly add our cereal

So again, you need a whole box of just the rice Chex cereal, which is about 12 ounces

And you're going to this is the part like they say we're usually I will start I will use a freezer bag and that's just

And then just shake it and get everything nicely incorporated

but for sake of time, I'll just leave it in the bowl here and

Because I don't have a little helper that's trying to grab all the pieces here. I'll just

Try to make sure everything gets coated

There we go, and then we'll look at our one cup of our powdered sugar to this recipe it smells so good

one cup of powdered sugar

There we go

Okay, we'll just add one cup of our powdered sugar on top of this I'll try to keep that contained

And this is great obviously this recipe is perfect for you know holiday gatherings, you know parties that sort of thing

but I will tell you I love adding it to like a mason jar for instance like a mason jar and

Giving it as a gift a lot of times when I give gift cards

I feel like it just kind of is a little impersonal but I well a lot of times I'll love peppermint. Oh, oh

Thanks, Tonya for joining. Yes. I do - honestly, it's one of my absolute favorite oils. I use it

Like I say almost every single day

mostly for head discomfort

But I will say just as a side benefit when I put it under my nose forehead discomfort

My nasal passages always just open up. So well, I just love peppermint. You love it. Love it. Love it

So here this is nicely coated with our white chocolate and our powdered sugar and then people just go ahead and put a sprinkle over

With our crushed peppermint and just sprinkle it in and just kind of maybe stir it a little bit

And like I said just for reference if you wonder how much crushed peppermint to add this was about 6 candy canes

But I would say you could probably get by with five probably it was a little bit extra but I love peppermint Zoe's

Fine for me, but like I said when it comes to gift-giving a lot of times when I give a gift card

I feel like a be a little impersonal. So I love the idea of adding this to like a mason jar

Pudding with it

um, just a little bow and a ribbon and then going ahead and

You know your gift card to the jar that is you know that you filled with this snack mix

It's just a nice stuff. It was just a nice accompaniment with the gift card. I think

And there you go. You see how it looks all fun and festive and it just smells amazing

It's so good

So there is our peppermint muddy buddies. We'll try to bring the camera up here without knocking it off

There we go

So that is our peppermint peppermint muddy buddies or peppermint puppy chow recipe that used our peppermint essential oil in it again

I just hope it kind of inspires you to just think of ways that you can use your essential oils

like I said a lot of us use them more for health reasons and you're gonna make homemade Beauty recipes and sometimes homemade cleaners and

A lot of times like will diffuse them as well. But I love that you can use like peppermint

I also love using lemon essential oil too because it's another vitality oil in different recipes

And like I said, you can simply just add it to your coffee or your tea if you want

so I hope this kind of inspires you to use your essential oils in other ways as well if you still need to get your

premium starter kit you can do

So the link that is in this post here as a reminder of what is included in the premium starter kit

You get 11 essential oils and one of the oils that you do get is the peppermint essential oil

so you'll get 11 essential oils and

And they're in the 5 ml sized bottles which to give you an idea of how much that is. It's about 80 drops

So for this recipe, we only used about 3

So it kind of gives you an idea you get quite a bit oil in your premium starter kit

You'll also get your choice of diffusers actually

There's my desert. Mist right there diffuser

So you can get either a desert mist or a dew drop diffuser in your kit

You'll also get a couple of really good samples one of the samples that you'll get is this mixture red sample?

It's that powerful antioxidant drink that is really good for adults and kids to take helps with overall wellness helps with promoting energy

So if you're kind of someone that feels a little sluggish mid-afternoon and you need a little pick-me-up

This can help with that. It also helps with eye health as well. So it's great

Like I say for kids too

If you think that they're not getting enough of the right nutrients only about 2 ounces of this a day

And they are good to go. You'll get a couple samples of that. You will also get to try the theives

I love this the theives all-natural cleaner. I use it on almost any surface in my house to be honest with you

You'll get a sample of this as well

So in addition to your 11 oils and your diffuser and their samples that kit retails for like $300 or around $300

But it's marked down to just 160 and I personally will give you

$25 back and either the form of Amazon gift card or PayPal cash

So you'll get that entire kit

Including the 11 oils and your choice of diffusers for basically a hundred and thirty-five dollars plus shipping and tax

so like I said

If you need to get that you can do so via the link that is in this post as always if you have any

questions about

Essential oils or how to use them or you know what they can do for you or how to get started

you can always send me a direct message or send me an email or just leave a comment down below and I'll be happy to

Help you. Thank you so much for taking the time to watch this video, buh-bye

For more infomation >> Christmas Recipe for Muddy Buddies Made with Peppermint Essential Oil - Duration: 10:39.

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Too Tall for the Military - My Advice - Duration: 3:07.

the United States military Uncle Sam's premier fighting force focused on

protecting the American citizens these heroic men and women have lost life and

limb in order to ensure our safety and they truly inspire bravery in all of us

it's a dream of some including myself to one day join their ranks however there's

a huge uncontrollable factor that can make or break this dream you can see

your claim to fame become the one thing that shuts down your dream in an instant

height

welcome back to red white and doodle today we will be focusing on a different

type of video it is a dream of many to someday join the Armed Forces myself

included I hope to be an Air Force pararescue jumper however one of my

biggest anxieties is that I'll be too tall to make this dream come true height

has been a big player in my life this helps with different sports seeing

and reaching things others can't and just in general being known as the tall

guy I originally wanted to be a pilot the height limit for all pilots is 6

foot 5 I reached 6 foot 5 at the age of 13 now my growing is steadying and I

should cap out under 6 foot 8 which is the height limit for all service members

however I realized that even though my worries have halted this may not be the

case for everyone so today I'm going to give some personal insight on the topic

one thing to keep in mind is that you were born with your body for a reason

everyone has a greater purpose in life and we were all made to fit that you may

think that right now it's the military but if you end up being too tall to

enlist there's reasoning behind it even if you

don't see it yet ok so let's say you fit the requirements but still feel like

you're too tall well look at marcus luttrell this modern legend and only

survivor of Operation Red Wings is 6 foot 5 he survived the toughest military

training in the world to become an elite SEAL team 10 operator the United States

military thrives in diversity they consist of every size shape color

and background imaginable close to 57 million people have served in the

American armed forces there's definitely been someone in there who's your height

or taller still not convinced well there is still the possibility of you getting

involved in the military as a civilian not to mention local public services

such as police firefighters and medical personnel although it is an amazing

career field the Armed Forces are not the only way you could do your part as

an American I hope this video has helped just provide some insight on the topic

if you would like more videos like this i'd highly recommend you let me know in

the comments thanks for watching and as always don't forget to thank our

veterans

For more infomation >> Too Tall for the Military - My Advice - Duration: 3:07.

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Worms for Lunch - an original song (and cleaning my room...) - Duration: 2:51.

For more infomation >> Worms for Lunch - an original song (and cleaning my room...) - Duration: 2:51.

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For more infomation >> Local family still looking for woman missing in Peru - Duration: 1:53.

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New SC law gives tax credit for gas or car maintenance - Duration: 2:05.

For more infomation >> New SC law gives tax credit for gas or car maintenance - Duration: 2:05.

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New Indiana bills for 2019 legislature - Duration: 2:33.

For more infomation >> New Indiana bills for 2019 legislature - Duration: 2:33.

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How My Love For 🅱T$ Messed Me Up | Story Time - Duration: 17:38.

Da da da da da da doo~

Oh, hey! I wonder what that is!

NO DON'T GO IN THERE! (AHH!)

Uh, why not?

You know when characters get bit by zombies but the effects don't set in right away?

What's going to happen to me?

Oh, dear.

Sit down.

This'll take a while.

On May 21, 2018, I uploaded the video "It's Okay To Like Things"

about my developed interest in a certain boy band.

One of my conclusions was:

"Maybe I won't care a year from now, but I embrace my present enthusiasm."

Turns out I forgot that "embracing my present enthusiasm"

shouldn't include abandoning all critical thought, morals, and sense of self.

My memory's not great, but I'll pick up from where I left off.

After the BBMAs, I felt like a changed person.

Like something in my brain was different.

That's how surreal it was to see them on TV.

I decided I was proud to be an A.R.M.Y and let the term define me.

By the time school started, I had a jacket with their logo on it and invested a lot of time into them every day.

My mom and I watched more of their TV appearances together.

It was nice to be open about what I loved, and to enjoy that thing with others.

They were so unproblematic and entertaining,

I started feeling convinced they were perfect people who would never disappoint me.

Every now and then, there'd be a slip up of some kind.

It seemed to happen more and more frequently.

There'd be a questionable collaboration or something and I'd choose to ignore it.

I was happy.

I wasn't going to let callout culture ruin my happiness!

So I drowned everything out with their music.

But that started to fail, too.

"Idol" felt...

off.

I was actually disappointed in the lack of lyrical content,

especially in the chorus,

but that was the point!

It was /supposed/ to seem manufactured and fake

to ironically meet antis' expectations, right?

The weird thing is how I enjoyed them for what I called

"good quality generic romantic pop music"

—even if I couldn't relate to the lyrics, I like the aesthetic, anyway—

and when they changed that,

it didn't feel natural.

Their albums are called /Love Yourself/,

and have a perceived narrative,

but they never actually sang about self-love until the final installment.

They're praised for having a message of self-love—

with lyrics from "Idol", "Answer: Love Myself",

and other recent songs as evidence—

but they never really wrote about that for most of their career.

In fact,

they rarely spoke about it unless it came up in interviews.

I decided that even if this message was manufactured for them by their company,

however recently,

it was still a good message, and they represented it,

so I was okay with it.

But I couldn't relate to the extent that A.R.M.Ys

thanked them for teaching them how to love themselves.

I was slowly becoming insecure about them,

and felt guilty about it.

So what if Yasushi Akimoto wrote misogynstic lyrics?

The song was cancelled!

So what if Nicki Minaj defended her brother for his crimes against children?

They probably didn't know!

So what if they did a photo shoot at a-

OK, I definitely couldn't "so what" that one.

I considered it a strike in a series of likely

far more than three and decided to move on.

They're humans! They make mistakes!

I could never demonize them.

I thought acknowledging these problematic things

without attributing them to the members

was critical thinking.

It wasn't.

And I didn't see that until it was too late.

Around mid-October, I found Stray Kids.

My first impression was that they were objectively better,

but my gut reaction to that was,

"No, don't say that! You're loyal to that group!"

I felt bad for sneaking a stream and "forgave" myself

by listening to /Love Yourself: Answer/ every day.

I realized I'd constructed a weird power dynamic

between myself and my interest,

so I started mentally backing away slowly

before anything worse happened.

Maybe I could become a casual fan of only their music,

far enough to be unaffected by their actions.

But /Mono/ pulled me back in because it spoke to

themes I didn't know I wanted to hear.

Then JK pulled me further with GCF.

I never admitted it,

but I always viewed both of us as

soft strong heroes with a camera.

I don't think I'd ever related to a celebrity more,

and I didn't want to leave him.

Then it happened.

I don't remember the exact day,

but one of the members was called out

for wearing a controversial shirt.

Heh, oh, was it too accepting?

[gasp]

That's so /bad/!

Thus began frantically grasping at straws

to save my peace of mind.

Everyone was as frantic as I was,

nothing was certain,

nothing helped,

and everything hurt my brain.

I was reaching a breaking point and I was scared.

I tried to ignore it.

As big as this was,

I tried to ignore it.

The next day, when I came home from school,

my mom was like,

"Did you hear one of your Korean boys

got in trouble for wearing the wrong shirt?"

Heh, yep!

And I don't want to talk about it right now. Bye!

My heart dropped.

Disappointing /me/ is one thing,

but disappointing my /mother/ is a death sentence.

I didn't know what to feel or think.

That was the problem.

I desperately wanted someone to tell me.

My issue is that with a lot of discourse,

to avoid conflict,

I side with the most liberal, popular opinion

because I want to have the "right" one.

I'm reluctant to form opinions for myself,

so I wasn't at all prepared for this.

I decided to cancel the group until they apologized,

but desperately hoped that they would.

Eventually, BigHit released a statement that set me on the verge of a mental breakdown.

They thoroughly explained and apologized for

everything the group had been called out for lately,

reassured everyone of their values, and promised to do better in the future.

It calmed me in the moment,

but afterward it was like my heart was getting torn in two.

If it was exactly what I wanted to hear,

then why did it feel like I was tricking myself into believing it?

For what felt like the next hour, I-

[GASP]

started trying to think for myself!

I'm not being dramatic. It was genuinely painful.

But they apologized!

But it wasn't /from/ them!

But if they're bad then we're bad!

It's okay to be wrong! It's okay to be wrong!

Form your own opinion! It's okay to be wrong!

Why can't I form my own opinion?!

But if we acknowledge /this/,

we have to acknowledge everything else they've never properly addressed!

You mean everything /we've/ never properly addressed?!

AAAAHHHH!!!!!

I'm not going to lie.

It was mostly yelling.

My mom checked on me multiple times.

It's nothing. I'm just working through some stuff.

I'll tell you later.

For better or worse, something inside me was breaking.

Eventually, I gave my mom my phone

to read the whole statement for herself

while I went off to do something else.

When I came back,

she gave her honest, objective opinion

that lifted a huge weight off my shoulders

and opened my eyes.

"They're adults."

And I was like, you know what?

Yeah! They /are/ adults.

They /are/ adults!

They /ARE/-!

So they collaborated with problematic people.

That doesn't reflect on /them/!

That's like saying, "I voted for them, but I don't support them."

Yes, you do!

No. They're not me. I'm not them. They don't reflect on me.

Yes, they do!

Voting /is/ supporting them!

You literally support them for who they are and what they represent.

You clearly have no conflict with their beliefs.

That's what voting /is/.

It's okay because it was in the past.

Like, /years/ ago in the past.

You mean when they were /also/ adults who should've known better?

When others hid or cancelled it or released a blanket statement so they'd never have to apologize directly?

Ignorance is one thing.

Repeated ignorance and learning nothing is another.

When you mess up,

you have to acknowledge it, apologize, learn, and do better.

That's how you show growth.

When celebrities mess up,

it's different than if a friend or family member did.

With someone close,

you can sit them down and say,

"Here's what you did wrong and why it hurt me or others and how you should be better,"

and they'll listen to you because they care about you,

and you'll give them a chance because you care about them.

With celebrities, when they mess up, they're on their own.

They have to recognize it for themselves,

which might be hard to come by.

They're not obligated to personally confront it.

If it doesn't hurt their entire audience, why bring it up?

So, it's difficult to see change in them

because no matter how much they claim to love their fans,

they won't listen to absolutely everyone.

They /know/ what they're wearing,

they /know/ what they're doing,

and they /know/ who they're working with.

Either that, or they're incredibly ignorant,

which is just as inexcusable.

I couldn't continue to support or listen to them in good conscience.

Which brings us to November 16th,

when, for the first time in a while,

I was honest with myself

and spilled out how I genuinely felt,

while starting to figure out how I got to that point.

As you can tell,

I had a lot of bad feelings in me.

I was angry, hurt, and resentful.

It felt like I was betrayed by people who were supposed to be my friends.

They were just a group I allowed myself to enjoy,

so why did it hurt so much?

Why did it feel like I was coping with trauma,

not getting over an interest?

Ignoring this—as I do best—

I resolved not to give up on people,

and threw myself into Stray Kids at full force!

Woah, woah, woah.

You're telling me that after seven months of this,

you learned absolutely nothing,

and decided to try /again/?!

Yep!

Even more so, actually!

We'll get there. Don't worry.

As the smoke cleared in my brain,

I developed more and more opinions and realizations

about what I'd experienced the past seven months

and what I was experiencing at the time,

and put it into words as best I could.

However,

it's...

mostly...

just ranting...

and ranting...

and ranting.

And I don't have the energy to talk about all of this.

Anyway, as you can tell,

I was spitting a lot of negative energy into this rant for a few days.

Then I read a thread about emotional dependency

by Twitter user @BTS_ARMY_INT,

and it cleared up a lot for me because it was exactly how I felt.

I cannot blame people for not taking responsibility for their actions

without acknowledging my own flawed approach to them.

Part of the thread says, quote:

They went on to quote an article called

/Is It Love, or Are You Seeking Validation?: When You Don't Know Your Own Worth/

by Savannah Grey of Esteemology.com.

When people ask, "How is he real?" about boys,

sometimes it's like, he's not! He's an anime boy! Easy!

But sometimes they're like, "How is he real?" and it's a real person,

so I'm like, makeup! Contacts! Hair dye! Stylists! Editing! Training!

But more people get stuck on the fact that they are real people.

When you see someone practically perfect in every way

—/Mary Poppins/ reference—

it proves how imperfect you are,

validates how you feel about yourself,

and makes it difficult to value yourself any higher.

But people cling to these perfect images anyway.

Side note:

Stray Kids are great!

I love them so much as of this moment!

I might not care about them tomorrow. Nothing's guaranteed.

But I appreciate how they're self-produced,

self-assembled,

self-written,

and put so much into everything they make.

They're kind and educated and their personalities shine through their talents.

It feels very authentic.

[rattling]

AHEM.

You know what's /not/ as authentic?

Alright.

For some reason, my SD card is not working, but I'm not gonna let that stop me

because I need to get these words out!

It's December 31st!

I don't care! [clap]

Anyway-HEH!

You know what's not as authentic?

All of your Instagram posts are perfect.

Of course not everyone's going to believe that #stay #are #beautiful when you look like /that/, dude.

These boys have natural beauty marks and baby fat and flaws that make them human,

and they still tend to remove them.

All I ever care about is what they have to say.

It's always nice to hear from them.

It's also how I felt with Bangtan.

Admittedly, their photography was often more candid.

For me, my emotional dependency

stemmed from social issues.

It was difficult for me to make and keep friends

for most of my life,

and when I found someone who'd spend time with me,

I was especially clingy to them.

They felt like friends I could cling to without bothering anyone.

They were "there for me" every day.

I projected how much they cared for me so much

that my jacket felt like a hug when I first attained it.

"We don't deserve them! They're precious angels!"

"Oh my gosh, I love them-they-they love us so much, we don't deserve them! Blah, blah, blah!"

"We don't deserve them!"

I read that so many times, I started to believe it.

For some reason, people think that others genuinely caring about them

and giving them the best of themselves

is undeserved.

I was raised with the belief that

Jesus died for the sins of all humankind.

If I deserved that,

no human's love is unwarranted,

especially from a distance.

I try to remind myself of that every day.

In a way, I did use them to validate negative beliefs about myself—

No one else was there for me,

I could only attempt to be as good a dancer as them

or be as beautiful on the inside,

they were all I had.

I repaid them for their unconditional love with loyalty.

I listened to them and only them.

I could hardly make it through other artists' songs

because all I could think was, "I miss my friends."

Weirdly enough,

even though I thought of them as friends,

I never called them by their real names

because I wasn't on a first name basis with them.

I was self-aware to an extent and told myself,

"Wow! When we eventually have to leave them,

it's going to hurt really bad!"

I knew it wasn't permanent,

but I figured I had at least a year.

I was wrong, and it /did/ hurt a lot, but I survived.

Ironically, they prepared me to leave them

by reminding me to love myself.

Loving myself doesn't require anyone else's permission.

Including theirs!

But it was mostly out of spite.

I didn't want to interact with A.R.M.Y so I could keep my "friends" to myself,

but I wound up performing some of their choreography at my school.

The first time, it was for myself,

because I wanted to be a hero,

and "Anpanman" spoke to that exact desire.

The second time, it was because I felt pressured to.

The third time, it was because I craved attention from the audience.

This was the start of desperately using my interests

to get validation from /anyone/.

I'd practice for a solid month just for a few seconds of applause from strangers.

I'd have to go bigger or be more impressive each time.

Even now, I've been practicing the same difficult dance

every day I can for a solid two months,

and, in the process,

have broken several pairs of shoes,

pushed myself to the point I could hardly breathe just to try again,

practiced after having been sick for weeks,

resulting in being sore everywhere the next day,

and probably hurt myself in more ways than I realize.

It'd somehow gotten worse when I got into Stray Kids

because I started using them as a coping mechanism to get over BTS,

and I thrived off any interaction from other STAYs on Twitter.

My brain mistook interaction for friendship,

and I felt less lonely by isolating myself as much as possible.

My timeline was flooded with them because I followed over a hundred people,

and when it was hard to see anything else,

I realized I was starting to let being a STAY define me

like I had started to let being an A.R.M.Y define me.

It was too much.

They were a backup plan to a backup plan,

and I started getting worried that I'd need

a backup plan to a backup plan to them

and so on and so forth and what have you.

But they were frustratingly good

and raised my standards so much

that was impossible.

So I got scared I was entirely dependent on them.

I didn't want to get hurt again,

but I couldn't stop.

Then I had a breakthrough a few days ago on my Tumblr.

I realized that if I wasn't careful,

that's exactly what was going to happen with Stray Kids.

They're going to disappoint me one day.

They're humans, and although they seem cool

—which they are, and I love them—

that's just a fact.

So I started to distance myself from them.

I have a tendency to invest all or nothing,

but I'm changing that.

I unfollowed maybe a hundred people

and kept the twenty or so mutuals I had made

so it feels like I really have friends.

I watch their videos when I feel like it,

not out of obligation to catch up.

I make a point to look for other music and artists

and enjoy them guilt-free.

I changed my hero training music

back to the /My Hero Academia/ soundtrack,

and listen to their discography while doing something productive.

I do sort of think of them as friends,

and use stage names,

but I don't feel super close to them or assume I know anything.

I don't care if I get a physical album or meet them one day.

It doesn't fill me up when they say they love STAY

because I don't full align myself with that concept.

The name implies a promise I'm not obligated to make.

I use "appreciate" more than "love."

I'm being honest with myself and looking at them critically.

It's great that they're educated on racial slurs,

but they need to stop using AAVE in their English raps

and stop altering their appearances so much on Instagram

and get enough sleep

and /I Am YOU/ wasn't as strong as their other albums!

I don't put them on a pedestal.

They're in my life, and I'm thankful for them,

but I won't let strangers change my sense of self

so drastically ever again.

You are talented and beautiful in your own right.

You have so much more potential and blessings ahead of you than you could ever imagine.

You're capable of creating your own future and loving yourself and being your own person.

You're capable of having an identity outside of your interests.

In reality, they never did anything to hurt me.

I only approached them in such a way

that allowed me to get hurt.

And now I'm accepting that I can't trust human people

to never disappoint me,

or rely on them for love, validation, and happiness.

I can only trust God.

My identity is in Christ,

not in people I was fine before and after knowing.

Love and validation should come from myself.

I can and will use music

as inspiration and motivation

without feeling chained to it or its artists.

I can and will support people

without obsessing over or prioritizing them in my life.

I can and will create things from my own brain

and values that I have conviction in.

As long as I can keep that in mind,

I can get stronger on my own.

And if my identity and self-esteem

don't depend on mortal beings of this world,

I'll be unstoppable in 2019 and beyond.

AND BEYOND!

For more infomation >> How My Love For 🅱T$ Messed Me Up | Story Time - Duration: 17:38.

-------------------------------------------

Sara Arber on 'Not for Policy Impact Then' - Duration: 0:57.

"You do research because you find it interesting

and important, but then it's up to somebody else to do the policy.

At that time we weren't in the era of impact and follow-through.

So I must admit I was interested in contributing to the academic debate about these things,

and also some of the methodological debate about how best to measure the class of women

and so on, so both the substantive - and you present it at conferences, you publish it,

and then you go on to something else.

I mean, the work's going to get quoted, it was reprinted in various places, so it obviously

had some kind of impact.

Does it bother you if it doesn't, then?

No.

I mean, you're not, you're not doing it for that reason. "