welcome back to my channel I know I kind of look like I'm in a jungle today
because of my animal print sweater in the background but we're gonna move past
it today we're gonna talk about a very highly requested topic that you guys
asked me to film a video on and we are gonna be talking about the untold truth
about waiting to have sex until marriage and I'm gonna share with you my
experience some tips and tricks and later in this video we're gonna talk
about if you've already had sex what god thinks of you how you can be renewed
from that and move on so make sure to stick around for that and excuse the
lighting in here it's kind of dark but I feel like it kind of sets the mood for
the topic we were gonna talk about so question of the day did your parents
talk to you about sex I would love to know this question because my parents
were super open about sex my mom had me at a very young age and she didn't want
me having kids at a very young age so she would talk to me about sex a whole
lot just making sure I knew about it and knew what God thinks about it I wanted
to share what I know with you guys so make sure to leave that comment down
below now a little background on my sex life I don't know what you call this but
a little background on my purity so my parents took me to a purity banquet when
I was like 13 or 14 years old I think it was so much fun you got dressed up in
like a big almost formal gown kind of and you get purity ring's so that
signifies waiting to have sex until you're married and I remember making
that decision that night that I was definitely going to wait to have sex
because I wanted to say that only for my husband Kyle and I dated for about seven
years which is a very long time and to say that there wasn't any temptation
would be a complete lie because if you ever see my husband he is a hot tea so
that was really hard I will 100% say that and he can definitely say that as
well waiting to have sex till marriage with a commitment and it was the hardest
thing probably I've ever done in my life because when you're so attracted to
someone and when you date someone for that
it is natural to have those feelings it's not dirty it's not sinful God
created sex and he loves sex he created it he loves sex in the right environment
fire in the fireplace is good fire with out of the fireplace is bad sex within
marriage is amazing it's great it's perfect it's how God designed it sex
outside of marriage is not good and not how God designed it and it can be very
damaging so yes temptation was definitely real we
were not perfect I'll just say that right now we were not perfect but we did
wait until marriage and we are so happy that we did can I just say our honeymoon
was an absolute dream at least for me it was I don't know about for Kyle but I
was like this is heaven right now I am so glad we waited I've never felt so
connected to someone in my life and just so at peace and happy that I waited to
do that with only one person so from a lot of my non-christian friends they
would always say like don't you want to try before you buy like why aren't you
having sex or why aren't you doing it like what's the problem like don't you
want to go into marriage knowing that your husband or wife is good at sex so
for me that was not an issue whatsoever because if you don't know what sex is
supposed to be like then you only know that person you only know what sex is
with that person and how special is that so while we are dating I read this
article about the difference between being pure and being a virgin being a
virgin is just someone who hasn't had sex curity looks at the state of heart
and the nature of my thoughts so I'll link that article down below and it was
just so interesting knowing that not only in my own version but I have to be
pure in my thoughts pure in my heart and pure and what I think about you know it
says even lusting upon a man or woman is already committing sin with them so that
day it really hit me to be like no I'm not just striving to not have sex I'm
striving to be pure like to have a clean heart and a clear mind and a clear
spirit so that was super eye-opening to me if so many people asked the question
of how far is too far how far can i push
limit so I'm still a virgin on my wedding night but it's not crossing the
line can we have oral sex can I lay down together can we make it out how far can
we go until it's actually called sex I got a great example from a pastor from
the porch podcast this was like amazing so imagine if you were near a very high
building and somebody asks you how close can I get to the edge of that high
building before it becomes detrimental and he said the first question he would
ask is do you have a desire to jump off that building and if they said yes then
he would say I would stay on the ground I wouldn't even go up the elevator don't
even cause yourself to be tempted don't even cause of yourself to think about
going up and jumping off the building don't go there so that really hit me if
you guys want to listen to that church podcast I'll also have that linked down
below I was just like wow that is such a good analogy so that's my biggest thing
when people ask how far is too far if you're having that temptation already
stay on the ground don't even walk towards the elevator don't even try to
go up the elevator don't even press the button to go on the elevator up to the
top of the building anything like that will just cause more and more temptation
so on my Instagram I was getting a lot of questions about setting boundaries
and I think the biggest thing in dating is knowing that both of you guys have
the same values do not date someone or even talk to someone who doesn't have
the same values as you and who doesn't want to wait or is not disciplined to
wait so being disciplined and setting boundaries and holding each other
accountable is so important constantly talking about those boundaries back and
forth to each other also have good solid Christian friends who have the same
beliefs as do you do that can hold you accountable as well tell them your
boundaries and tell them when you felt tempted or anything like that so that
they can hold you accountable and say girl don't even get yourself into that
situation like call me if you have a problem and so I think that is super
important and I definitely had friends that I could do that with it sounds so
cheesy but if it's what it takes right your boundaries
with your boyfriend almost like a contract sign it and make them known
like these are our rules for ourself because not only are we trying not to
have sex like when people ask me why are you trying not to have sex it's I'm not
trying to not have sex I'm trying to love God and I know that God wants
what's best for me so I'm gonna try to honor him because I want to live how he
wants me to live because I know that's gonna be my most joyful happy self is
living how he wants me to live another tip I have is to stay really connected
with Jesus throughout your dating relationship be in your word every day
be praying to God every day asking for help and asking for wisdom and ask for
dedication to this commitment into him the more you get to know God and know
how much he loves you you're gonna want to return that love and glorifying him
and being obedient to him a lot of questions I get is what if I've already
had sex what if I have already gone too far am I done
can I keep having sex because I already did it or what how do I like redeem
myself and that gives a whole message of Jesus right there which I'm so excited
to share with you guys if you love the Lord and you truly feel sorry in your
heart and you repent God is gonna forgive you of that sin and wipe you
completely clean of it you're gonna become a born-again version as silly as
that sounds you will so two great examples of this are actually on YouTube
: sob I'm sure you guys have heard of them they are an awesome Christian
couple here on YouTube Savannah which is the girl she had a little girl outside
of wedlock and what she met Cole she wanted to be pure she wanted to remain a
virgin until her wedding night so throughout their whole dating life
they remained pure they did not have sex and what's so special is Cole says I
look at you like a virgin I don't see you with the world's eyes of having sex
and having a child outside of marriage I see you as God sees you and you are
washed clean from your sin and so their wedding night she was a virgin and that
is just so cool to me is God washes you clean from it if you
decide to turn away from your sin God wants to give you a fresh pure heart and
that is just so special that's like that's the story of Jesus and don't feel
like if you've already messed up you've already had sex that you can't be clean
because you can and you can still experience the joy that sex brings into
a marriage I looked at the Instagram questions that you guys had for me and I
think I pretty much answered all of them that you guys had but if I did it and I
miss one make sure to leave it in the comments down below and I'll definitely
bring it up in a different video I want to start talking more about dating in
marriage on my channel because I think it's so special and I love love and
Jesus's example of perfect love is such an inspiration and I want to share that
with you guys and it just be an encouragement to you guys
so if you guys are interested leave video topics down below thank you guys
so much for watching and I'll see you next time
wish it
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