This lighting is not to good, I can tell.
what is up YouTube? what is happening? what is going on? what is up?
get all my wrinkles and fucking like black eye and
everything up stuffing weird ear good get it all in there and see it all
through the camera so this is what's up I want to tell you guys what's up I am
going through a crisis shouldn't swallow said I wouldn't swear now I always been
creative of done a lot of creative things whether it is creating music
which is what I started with whether it is helping friends with music videos
directing some smaller films I've always had this creative outbursts
and this channel I took everything down from this channel if you check the day I
think I created this channel in 2012 and I had uploaded some videos and I went
hiatus because I was helping everyone else and I wasn't creating anything for
myself there was this quite right that I heard
from 50 cent I think was the person that said it the quote was I can't even get
the point out that's how like that's how intense it is you know what I'm saying
so like I'm sorry for the lighting that's first of all you always get that
if you're gonna have like a backdrop like that the quote itself it was hold
on two seconds so the quote was I have it here fuse depression is a luxury I
can't afford so I see haters and I just keep on
working it's cool I'm not here by accident shit I bet it would work a lot
different because I already just been able to be involved with the business
aspect good thing and you wouldn't have to be the the personal and the
psychological because people don't understand us a lot of shit behind the
thing is that going with just when you delete or when you go one in front you
have to be a counselor you got to be a preacher psychologist you got to be all
this shit because motherfuckers depend on you and you can't be like I ain't
fucking with you today nigga you got to open your heart up your ears and put
your family on pause or whatever you doing to make sure you taking care of
the crew you're in line and it's a like at points if you ever going through
something emotional y'all there's no there's no break there's a I say
depression is a luxury I can't afford I said that I said like when they get
going today things whatever it is and they have those feelings I said well
when I get a chance to do that because I can't afford that luxury depression is a
luxury I can't afford out of it all that stuck with me he wrote this in 2010 and
I think about this every day because when I was grinding I was coming up when
Alabama started to come out and before clothing lines were all the thing I
started to import an export clothes I didn't just purchase a bunch of
t-shirts and brand it and sell it off I actually started talking to
manufacturers from all warehouses across China that I built a relationship at 19
and I couldn't speak any Mandarin at all and we just had this
communication barrier but we were able I was able to get a really good supplier
and a really good distributor manufacturer cuz there's a lot of
difference in those terms and I was doing some wholesale and um and I was
constantly working the point of the story is that I was constantly working
at 19 doing everything I had just moved from Perth which is the most isolated
city in the world over to Sydney because I like the crying I like the daily
hustle I like I like the feel of Sydney Sydney is like like a sunny in New York
that feel that hustle and bustle everything's on the grow everything is
moving everything is happening and I personally felt really connected to the
same that's probably why it's been stuck in my mind this entire time and it
doesn't go away depression is a luxury I can't afford what is meant by that
it was meaning that why don't have time to be depressed I
have so much to do I have people relying on me I have friends that need this I
have family members that need this I have acquaintances that need this I
need to be at this place I need to attend this meeting I need to do this
and that for everyone else right and sure like you get a monetary return but
I hit a stage in my life where everything caught up to me and I had
tweeted it no I put this on a Facebook post years ago and I had hit back from
friends and followers and everything else and I didn't understand why I was
always wondering like what don't people get about this light if you're depressed
if you have time to stop and sit in your room whilst the rest of the world turns
that is a luxury that I can't have now I had a point in my life where I get a
complete 180 on that I I realized that what I was doing wasn't making me happy
I took down all the videos all the videos I had on YouTube music that I had
I wanted people to delete there anything with any like anything that I had a part
of I wanted people to like delete I don't know why I eat it's and it's not
like I stopped looking at depression
as a luxury and because I for the first time went through it a true depression
like I'm saying like I could have my girlfriend I could have my family and
it's linked to happiness they could all make me laugh and give me joy but they
couldn't make me happy and the things that I was doing wasn't making me happy
it brought me to a point of depression I was left everyone left left everybody
and went to a complaint new city I hustle my ass off I went to China when I
would when I knew no one spoke to different warehouses right to
communicate put a backpack on my back a suit and nothing like I didn't have
nothing it's crazy because this who one of my best mates calling me right now
hey bud hey Don what's going on eh I'm just doing a video at the moment can I
call you back all right I'll speak to see sure so I I did all
these things to to to grind to you to these things at the time while making me
happy this is what I thought and that's with everything if you get a chain you
think you're gonna be happy if I go get my like my hair is a mess right now if I
go get a fade it'll sort of make me happy but is it gonna make me happy in a
long jetty of things of an understanding of what you were doing and what you're
trying to achieve and just back to the slight point of my friend family and
friends bringing me joy and hat and laughter they can never make me happy
that's that's that's the one thing that's internally you got to do for
yourself and that's what I'm realizing that's why this I've stopped
king of this as a luxury and I've understood that depression is just deep
rest right deep breaths you need your body needs deep rest if you're going at
a hundred miles an hour it comes to a point where your body will shut down
we weren't built for this we made all of this for ourselves for the human races
and it's an amazing accomplishment but our bodies weren't built for this so
when it comes to all these materialistic and all these world situations that is
made by the human race and isn't natural it's only gonna come to a stage where
you feel down and you don't know why and it's not a luxury I just want to make
that clear it is not a luxury depression is a terrible thing but what right now I
understand it as is that it's a state of rest it's a state where you need to stop
look around realize what you have appreciate what you have
chill out for a moment and try and try
to put your best face forward now I'm not saying try and put your best face
forward and bottle it and bottle the emotions I'm saying you need to do a
realization on yourself and you need to do an analysis on yourself this is why
I'm sort of at this stage I'm making this video as
you can see I'm not I'm not a person that is usually really shy and or
anything like that like I'm always there for all of my friends all of my business
acquaintances and they can come to me with any issue and I'll sit there and
I'll listen and I'll do my best to help them out and be proactive but I hate
talking about my own issues I don't know why I'm still figuring it out I've come
to a point where I gotta start doing things doing things now for me when I
did all those plugins stuff I then did wholesale for bands did everything all
merch I've always done stuff for other people and this is where it starts so
bear with me
we're gonna get there and I'm super excited to bring you just I just true
art from myself hopefully some some definitely some little vlogs here and
there as well bring haha definitely keep on top of the community
and now on I won't be reuploading all the videos from 2012 until now they are
gone and I've lost a little subs because I
haven't done stuff for myself I know that this is different so I want to
bring you guys because they care about art I want to bring you guys
enlightenment in things that I learned and understand and if you're feeling
down most of all it's it's not what the videos that I'm gonna put forward if you
this is this is really the videos that I'm gonna put forward that's for myself
and I hope you can follow me in this journey but if you ever are feeling down
then if if you have anxiety about something about starting this and
starting that and and that leads to a depressed state contact me forever hit
me up I know how it feels I'm not a person that speaks and tells
it to anyone this is actually the first time I'm speaking about this and
that says a lot by itself you know what I'm saying it says that I'm not still
over this but I want to go I want to I want to go and be there for someone that
is still going through theirs and we can work it out together like I don't have I
don't claim to be this guy that has all the answers but I have some
understanding and I'm willing to share that understanding so bear with me all
right
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