"Mah gawd almighty he is broken in half!"
- "Tyson and Austin, Tyson and Austin!"
We get it.
The Attitude Era was the greatest period in wrestling history.
Stone Cold Steve Austin, The Rock, Triple H, The Undertaker and Mick Foley, in their
prime, under the same roof.
It's the sort of line-up that we can all agree featured the greatest main event scene in
wrestling history, and some of the whackiest stories.
Whether it be classic moments like Austin's beer bath, the Montreal Screwjob and Foley's
Hell in a Cell crash or the sexist and sometimes even racially insensitive undercard stories,
WWF Raw is War featured the sort of non-stop Action and Controvery approach that the company
has tried to replicate in the near 2-decades since.
Comparatively, the current WWE roster could be argued as having the deepest pool of talent
the company has ever seen, with a higher potential for top quality matches than at any point
in history, only with less potential for the same degree of controversy and a (some would
argue) criminally low amount of d*ck jokes.
So what would happen if some of the current crop were able to express themselves in the
same way as those in the attitude era did?
Which wrestlers would flourish opposite the likes of Steve Austin in the main event, Billy
Gunn and Road Dogg in the tag division or Steve Blackman in the mid-card?
To help make up your mind, we've compiled this list with our picks for the 10 Current
WWE Wrestlers Who Would've Been Perfect for the Attitude Era.
I'm xxx from cultaholic.com.
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-------------- 10.
Dean Ambrose When first establishing the criteria for the
perfect Attitude Era star, the most obvious characteristic you can look for in a contemporary
talent is... well... attitude - and nobody personifies the same no-f*cks-given attitude
of the Attitude Era better than Dean Ambrose.
There's a reason he's been dubbed the modern-era's Brian Pillman.
In his current persona, the former Shield brethren is a grand slam champion in his own
right, but given his history as a hardcore wrestler by the name of Jon Moxley, there
seem to be many more elements to this current day superstar than may first meet the eye.
Sure, his current "whacky Dean" persona would likely be pushed WAY over the top in an attitude
era setting and his seemingly hard to work with attitude - see the Steve Austin podcast
- may have been more of an issue back in the day, but the potential for him to be an unhinged,
hardcore maniac of the Pillman or Mick Foley ilk would have been way higher, and his (at
times) lacklustre in-ring style disguised by gimmicks, personality and those oh-so-impressive
facial expressions.
Just imagine Ambrose and Foley in their prime.
Truly worth salivating over.
9.
Braun Strowman Besides attitude, there is one thing the WWE
had a lot of back in the attitude era, and that was "big, sweaty men" - it truly was
the land of giants!
And there are no bigger, sweatier, or more "gianter" in the current era than Braun Strowman.
This near 7 foot tall bohemoth is the sort of wrestler who could've made it in any era
given his stature and athletic capabilities, but the former strong-man competitor has also
proven to have the comedic timing and believable bad-assery necessary to have existed at the
peak of the attitude era.
Can you imagine Braun Strowman coming face to face with attitude era Kane?
Squashing Kai En Tai?
Being a member of the Ministry of Darkness?
The possibilities are endless, and given how his on-screen antics have become more and
more reminiscent of the attitude era over the course of his career - think smashing
a double bass over Elias, emerging from a garbage truck, yanking down some conveniently
placed scaffolding - Strowman has already proven himself worthy of earning his spot
in those forever beloved attitude era highlight reels.
8.
EC3 Another vitally important aspect of the typical
attitude era WWE wrestler was their body image.
At the top of the card, the solid builds of Steve Austin, The Rock and Triple H reigned
supreme, with the impressive muscle definition on the likes of Ken Shamrock and Val Venis
impressing lower down the card.
While there was always space for the less body-builder-image physiques of The Hardys,
The Dudleyz, Big Boss Man and, of course, Rikishi, the unspoken rule at the time was
to look and be larger than life - the type of man a man would want to be, and a woman
would want to be with.
Nobody in current day WWE personifies this unspoken rule better than newly re-signed
NXT star EC3.
Not only is he attractive, well tanned and well oiled, but he most importantly has the
build.
Is there anyone in current day WWE with more muscles popping out of more places than this
man?
He's somewhat of a poster boy for the era to look at, but his on-the-mic comedic sensibilities
and smarmy, one-percenter persona would also prove to be an excellent foil for the rough
and ready hard men of the time, making him a potential friend of the McMahons and an
unmissable part of the action each and every Monday night.
7.
Gallows & Anderson When thinking back to the attitude era, it's
tough to look beyond the tag division.
Whether it was Edge & Christian, the Hardys, the New Age Outlaws, the Dudleyz or even the
short-lived return of The Road Warriors, it seemed there was always something interesting
and potentially show-stealing on offer.
People even look back on Too Cool with fond memories, and they were a couple of guys dressed
in baggy pants and sunglasses dancing to white-people-hip-hop...
Looking at the current WWE roster, there are a few standout teams that spring to mind as
great fits for such a division: The Usos, The Authors of Pain, The Bludgeon Brothers,
even The New Day could all provide exciting matches with any number of attitude era teams,
but none of them would reap the out-of-the-ring benefits of more adult content and the ability
to provide off-the-cuff moments of inspiration than Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson.
The 2 former Bullet Club members have proven inside and outside of the WWE that their comedic
timing and ability to cut a believable, realistic promo is second to none, and this is only
reinforced when they're given the opportunity to run with more adult content - see Gallows'
Sex Ferguson persona on the independents (changed to Tex Ferguson on WWE's Southpaw Regional
Wrestling), for a prime example.
Importantly for the era, the team is also made up of two pretty big dudes, making a
tag team feud with any number of teams - including the likes of the Brothers of Destruction - a
believable route for them to take; a fact that only reinforces how perfect they would
have been for the attitude era.
6.
Lana If there was one element of the attitude era
that has undeniably been improved in the years following, it's the women's division.
We've come a long way from the bra and panties matches between Sable and Jacqueline, the
public strip teases and the man-on-woman violence.
Happily, the WWE have also moved beyond their preferred look of big breasted blonde bombshells
and into a realm more representative of women of all body types.
But, if there was to be one current WWE women's wrestler who could've fit into the mould of
the attitude era's greatest women's wrestlers, it would be Lana.
The supremely attractive Mrs. Rusev would not only have the blonde bombshell thing going
for her, but she'd also have the gimmick.
In an era where "foreign heels" were often Canadian, a pro-Russia gimmick in the women's
division could've done wonders as regards getting Lana over as a top female character
on WWE programming and would've likely resulted in a prominent managerial role or a run or
two with the women's gold.
It would have been money.
5.
Chad Gable Thinking back to the later years of the attitude
era brings memories of a solid mid-card of hard-working, incredibly talented grapplers
like Chris Jericho, Chris Benoit, Perry Saturn, Dean Malenko and Eddie Guerrero, and if there
was to be one contemporary WWE talent that would be able to mix it in the ring with the
same technical prowess it would be Chad Gable.
Gable has moulded himself after technical wrestling legend Kurt Angle, adapting his
comparatively as legitimate competitive background to a grappler's style in the squared circle,
creating a somewhat timeless aura to his offense that would be well suited to matches with
any of the attitude era's greatest.
While there are arguably better in-ring workers around in WWE at the moment, few possess the
unique style and ability to pull it off as Chad Gable does, making him the ideal candidate
for a work-horse role in an attitude era roster.
4.
Big E There are some wrestlers who come along at
the right time and in the right place, and one such a wrestler who would've been just
those things during the attitude era is Big E. The New Day's powerhouse front-man would've
fit the look of the day, has a sense of humour unlike anyone else in the WWE right now that
would have felt right at home during the era, and has proven throughout his time with the
New Day that he isn't afraid to tackle sexual innuendo from time to time; a key aspect of
any attitude era mid-carder, I'm sure you'll agree.
He would have, of course, been a great fit for The Nation of Domination given his tag
team credentials and how almost every black WWE star of the time was associated with the
group, but it's in his in-ring work - which doesn't rely upon just his frightening strength,
but goes above and beyond that into something altogether more entertaining - that the former
Big E Langston could have become a real player in an attitude era roster; enhancing the slower,
methodical matches of those with super-strength into faster and more entertaining match-ups
that would have separated him from the rest and made him into a memorable attitude era
star.
3.
Fandango If there's a current WWE wrestler who could
benefit the most from a more adult-orientated product, it would be Fandango.
As one half of the fashion police, Fandango has been packaged in a family friendly manner
unbecoming of his more adult sense of humour and terrific comedic timing, though glimmers
of his more edgy side do remain.
The man with the dancer gimmick wouldn't need to change much, just go all-in on his slightly
creepy, live-the-gimmick persona, and really push home those circular thrusts.
He wouldn't ever be a main event player, but he'd be a good foil for the likes of The Godfather,
and may have even been the sort of character considered as a potential member of Right
To Censor, and who doesn't want to see that?!
2.
Elias The attitude era was all about celebrating
personas as close to the real person behind them as has ever been the case in the history
of wrestling, but that doesn't mean there wasn't room for gimmicks.
Most wrestlers had their personas born out of such gimmicks, and many others created
gimmicks out of such personas, but just as is the case now, there was always room for
a musician, especially one with the self-worshipping delusion and cheap heat capabilities of this
generation's Elias.
Who wants to walk with him?
Of course, some small elements to the character would have to be altered to fit in with the
times.
For example, Walk With Elias wouldn't quite work in an era branded as WWF and not WWE,
while his hipster-inspired get-up would not quite hit home in the same way as it does
in the contemporary landscape.
His grunge-inspired look and style of song would, however, be just as provocative, if
not more so, to a WWE fan of the time, and if ever there was a stereotypical audience
to draw legitimate hatred out of through home-town insults, it was the incredibly vocal attitude
era crowds.
In the ring, Elias could cover for his lack of speed by instead focussing on drawing heat,
and he could always cover up a loss by smashing someone over the head with his guitar.
He'd be a solid fit for a hardcore match, especially with so many clamouring for his
comeuppance, and if they ever did turn him babyface, they'd have a chart-topping music
artist on their hands.
It'd be a win for the WWE and a win for Elias.
1.
John Cena If you look at modern era WWE stars who can
talk the talk, walk the walk, look the look and backstage politic like a backstage politician,
then there are none more iconic than John Cena.
The 16-time world champion could out-talk almost anyone - as proven in his 2-year-long
programme with The Rock - and his never-budging good-guy persona would be one hell of a feather
ruffler for someone as anti-everything as Stone Cold Steve Austin.
Cena's even proven in recent years that he's capable of some great matches!
Imagine the promos between Cena and Austin or Cena and McMahon, the ways they could switch
his wholesome persona into something to be hated by an audience begging for blood and
controversy.
It'd be fantastic!
Feuds with The Ministry, The McMahons, Austin, Triple H, Mick Foley and The Undertaker would
be blockbuster events, and could you imagine him as the leader of an undercard stable with
Too Cool and Rikishi?
It would be priceless!
Cena is the sort of performer who has it all, and seeing him be able to mix it with the
very best of the best on a regular occurrence is a simply mouth-watering prospect.
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