my fellow idiots I am Susan Parker and today I wish to announce my candidacy
for the prime ministership of our country in 2019 but here's the good
thing oh you are ago I was only 19 years old from now I will be 21 and you're
after that 22 so unlike a lot of other leaders my increasing age will actually
make you more confident that what nature of compelling argument to elect me a lot
of the country is around 20 years of age so I will be a great representative for
that also my elder sister is always accusing
me and I'm not behaving like a younger brother and behaving who would like a
craft father so the older people are also covered basically you can say that
I will promote better public programs for the elderly while giving 30 push-ups
now I assure you that I will be a straightforward leader and to prove that
let me start by listing my weaknesses my biggest weakness is that I have too much
stock now my second biggest weakness is that sometimes I make people too happy
my biggest strengths are my youth and inexperience and I understand I will use
all of these when I go against my opponents but I am too mr. Boddy will no
doubt be a formidable opponent and I are showing you that I will face in at all
you can rest assured that if I do actually meet him I will ask him for an
autograph I don't believe there is any doubt about over win in an election
contest between myself and the prime minister so I would like to make some
campaign promises that I may or may not keep
major educational reform especially when it comes to sex education in that my
generation who at least the older generation some things continuing with
education we all learn things like the Pythagoras theorem back in school we
don't use those things in real life and that will change with me instead of
being smart and removing those things we will now use them as sobriety tests yes
rather than protein to machines you will now have to solve complex algebra to
prove that you are not change is a ministry
my father is a huge fan of the railways he knows everything about them so we
will do whatever he says
my friendly City is a wonderful economist
she will read the finance ministry she is also always the banker when we play
Monopoly do women I say there will be a change in the way women safely is seen
in this country then what will no doubt be a revolution saying we will hold men
accountable for their actions and not chained women for their choices of
clothing
I are showing that I will also engage with leaders of other countries my first
foreign trip will be to France for three key reasons first I don't like our civil
nuclear cooperation be he needs and deserves better second French president
demanded across is a twenty year is a 40 year old clean-shaven man which means
that beside here I will look slightly older hopefully 26 27 and third of all I
have a crush on loves frogs so I will take her there successful not only will
we have a wonderful new clearing we will also have a wonderful smart and
beautiful firstly I would also be a formidable opponent to China I will beat
the Chinese at their own game because I can speak Chinese by some zip I buy
magnesium unlike my competitors the Chinese won't be able to plot against
India right in front of me because I can't speak Chinese I will catch them
rotting and or maybe I could also join them plotting
because you see or don't know Chinese let's see I will also be the first Prime
Minister to visit and meet with the Eritrean president is our software key
so that Indians can that exists coming back home I know that the media and I
will not always see eye to eye we might have friction as a media and democratic
country they will be responsible for ensuring that I do not use my power for
personal profit totally unrelated note we are also going to drastically
increase the size of her presence I call upon you to vote for me in twenty
nineteen twenty twenty four twenty twenty nine twenty thirty four twenty
thirty nine twenty forty four and even beyond twenty forty nine which is even
in 2014 I will be just 52 years old and I assure you that starting 2019 I
will spread our country's agenda globally and around the world as well as
internationally to do that I will need to have a majority in the parliament I
will need a party and I know you're expecting the kind of
joke about having a party with music drinks and chips to address all the
national parties and say please can I be on your team
god bless you all and God bless the Republic of India
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