It's not about you or maybe it is. Which is it? We got to find out so stick around
and we got a really cool bonus for you at the end of this on how to exactly
create clarity on your next step moving forward.
So you've come up against another roadblock, you've come up against another
barrier, you're here looking for answers and I want to share something with you
that totally revolutionized how I think and how I feel especially when it comes
to responsibility. There's three different kinds of business and I'm not
talking about, you know, financial business or, you know, health businesses
or wealth businesses or offices or anything like that, I'm just talking
about what's my business and what's not my business. You know, this idea when you
can say, oh, that's none of your business, that's the kind of business I'm talking
about. There's three different kinds, the first kind I want to talk about is, what
is your business? What's relevant to you? What's relevant to your goals? What's
relevant to your dreams what's relevant to what you're trying to create? What is
within your control? I'm asking myself, what can I control in
this situation? Especially when I get yucky awful circumstances show up in my
world that I didn't necessarily create that was something that someone else
brought to me but I'm asking, okay, now it's my world so now that makes it my
business. If it's something that I can control, that I can change, that I can
shift, I totally take responsibility for it. Let's just say for example that you
have a relationship in your life that's really not working for you, a
relationship that's maybe yucky or worse, you know, maybe there's some heavy
language as I so did with these relationship like neglect or abuse or
harm, maybe there's yucky things in your world
that you're dealing with and, yeah, yucky is a sugarcoat but you know what I'm
talking about. If it's in your world, it's your business. That means you have a
responsibility to take a stand what's important to you so that's the first
kind of business, it's your business. The second kind of business is you got it,
their business. So there's your business and there's their
business, anything that's not relevant to you. A lot of the times, we will cross the
boundary on this because we think we know what's best for another person, we
think for that our version the best is also their version of best and I got to
tell you guys, that is so not the case, there's so many different circumstances
and different moral standards and different ideas and concepts that we
cannot possibly know what's best for another person. We can't possibly know
what they should do in a certain situation. You know they could totally
ask us for support and they can ask us for our ideas but to pretend that we
know what's best for another person is absolutely ludicrous, to pretend that I
know what someone should or should not do. In another video, we talked about the
heaviness of the yucky word of should. How could I possibly impose what someone
should do, I can't. I don't know their circumstances even if I think I do, even
if they're my child or my spouse, I can't know what's best for them. If I have
stewardship over them, if I have, you know, a responsibility as a parent, I'm totally
going to take that because that becomes then my business because I'm the parent,
I'm the one that has responsibility in that situation but if I'm looking at
someone else and I'm passing all these judgements on them, that is so not my
place because that's not my business. So if it's not your business, wash your
hands off it. Allow yourself to maintain a space of neutrality and say, that is
their business, that is their choices, those are choices that they're making in
their life, it's not about me. What they're doing is not about me, the
choices they're making, they're not about me, those are choices that they're making
based on their decisions, based on their experiences, based on their patterns, that
doesn't make it my fault or my responsibility if it's their business so
there's my business, there's their business. The third one, it's his business.
You know, you can call it God, you can call it the universe, you can call it
your highest power, you can call whatever you want but there are things that are
just not my business and not their business and that is the business of the
higher power, that's his business. His business looks like maybe there's a
natural disaster that happens. You know, it's really funny to me how in all of
these contracts we're like, car insurance or health insurance or life insurance
and anything like that, they always have the clause for acts of God and I thought,
wow, you know there's some that are not my business or anybody
else's business but it's all part of the master plan.
You know, you have this thought that it's not about me or it's not about someone
else, what is going on, could this possibly be part of a master plan. If
that's true, then we get to insert an element of trust. Trust in what we want,
trust that the best will come no matter what happens to us, whether it's our
business or someone else's or his business. Part of that for me is trusting
that the best will come whether or not I know how, it doesn't matter, a lot of the
time the how, it's his business. I have an idea of how I'm going to get from point
A to point B maybe in my goals or maybe in my success but I'm willing to let go
of that in exchange for something better should that present itself. Here's a
little bonus piece I want you to be really really familiar with. It's not
about you and at the same time, it is. Now wait a minute, that almost makes no sense , right?
How could both of those things be true?
Think about this, you cannot give what you don't have, you can only give what
you have. You know, driving around around your neighborhood or going to the
grocery store or doing who knows whatever errands that you could possibly
be thinking of, you've probably seen the people on the side of the road with
their cardboard signs asking for help and maybe you don't have cash in your
pocket so you can't give the cash that's not in
your pocket but maybe you do have a granola bar,
the front cedar, maybe you've got an orange that you just bought at the
grocery store that you could give, you could give it because you have it but
before you could even have it, you need to acquire it for yourself. When I talk
about that, I'm talking not about things, I'm talking about your feelings, your
emotions. If I am so bitter inside or if I feel any hatred or any spite or any
negative emotion, if that negative emotion is overpowering me and it's
going on on the inside, I can only give what I have so if I'm in a situation
where I'm needing to interact with another person and maybe it's a person
with a close relationship with me and I only have bitterness and anger and spite
with me, no matter how that person interacts with me, I can only give what I
have so I'm only going to be able to give bitterness and anger and spite.
That's all about me, that's all about me and I need to take an extra look inside and
say, what do I want to be sharing? What do I want to be giving? Am I willing to get
rid of the bitterness? Am I willing to get rid of the anger or the spite or the
negativity and nourish me first? When I nourish me first, all the bitterness,
all the anger, all the spite goes away and gets replaced with compassion, it
gets replaced with love, it gets replaced with caring and then I can forget
about me and go to work because I know I'm taken care of so it's not about you
but it is about you. Make sure that you take care of yourself, nourish your mind,
nourish your body, nourish your soul with words of life, with positivity so that
when the time comes that it doesn't have to be about you, it can be about the
person who needs you most. So now you've got this amazing clarity on what's yours,
what's not yours and you know how to give your gift to the world so I would
love to hear from you, leave me a comment below, hit the subscribe button, maybe
give the little bell a little jingle so you can get some updates from us on a
regular basis. I'll see you tomorrow.
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