- I get introduced to Lionel Richie
and I could tell that Lionel Richie doesn't know me,
has never heard of me, but because I'm the only other
black male at this event,
he acts like he knows me.
[dark electronic music]
- Welcome to "This Is Not Happening."
I'm Roy Wood Jr.
When traveling, make sure--
- [gasps] - [screams]
[ominous music]
[maniacal laughter]
♪ ♪
- [growling]
♪ ♪
[Roy shouts]
[cheers and applause]
- His new album is called "The Seven."
He is the legendary Talib Kweli.
[cheers and applause]
- So when I first started doing hip-hop music,
even though I'm known for music that has a message
and music that is not empty and music that is not vacuous,
I grew up wanting to be a rap star.
I didn't grow up wanting to be a conscious rapper.
I grew up, I wanted to be LL Cool J.
You know what I'm saying?
I wanted to be famous for a being a sexy motherfucker.
You know what I'm saying?
But by the time my career took off,
I was on a label called Raucous Entertainment.
And myself and Mos Def, we had a group called Black Star.
Right? [cheers and applause]
[laughs]
See, I was cheap for applause, because I don't got no jokes.
You know what I'm saying?
I said "Mos Def" so y'all could applaud
and Black Star and y'all familiar with that shit.
So by the time we blew up, the whole Raucous movement,
the whole underground movement,
it was looked at as the vanguard for conscious rap.
Like, they looked at us as bringing back
the sounds of Boogie Down Production and Public Enemy
and Rakim and Big Daddy Kane and everything.
So my homeboys, like, I was, like, 18, 19 years old.
My homeboys started going to strip clubs
and having fun and doing all the debauchery and stuff,
but they didn't even invite me to the strip club,
'cause they heard my records, and they thought,
"Kweli wouldn't want to come to the strip club with us."
[laughter]
And one of my best friends in the world, like, he worked--
he was a bartender at the strip club when we was, like, 19.
I didn't find this out till we were, like, 32.
You know what I'm saying? 'Cause they never told me.
I was like, "Yo, y'all niggas hanging out
at the strip club y'all didn't tell me?"
And he was like, "Yeah, you kick all that conscious rap.
You don't want to hang out the strip club."
So by the time I got on in the music business
and I started making money in the music business,
I really, really, really wanted to go to a strip club.
Not just a strip club, but all the parties.
All this partying down--like--
Anybody who knows me from when I first started
my career, you heard my records and it was conscious rap.
And I was in the streets.
Like, I don't just talk online; I don't just talk on records.
I go to the rallies. I go to the protests and all that.
But I also go to the nightclubs.
You know what I'm saying? I also turn up.
So the first time I ever went to a strip club,
in my life,
I went with Jermaine Dupri...
[laughter]
And Janet Jackson.
[laughter]
Because I was working on a song with Jermaine Dupri.
He had a artist that had sampled one of my records;
he wanted me to be on the remix and everything.
Shout-out to Jermaine Dupri.
But here's my advice.
If you've never been to a strip club,
in your life,
do not go with Jermaine Dupri.
[laughter]
Do not go with Janet Jackson.
And make sure you don't go in Atlanta.
[laughter]
Because if you go to a strip club with Jermaine Dupri
and Janet Jackson in Atlanta,
nothing will top that motherfuckin' experience.
So after my first strip club experience,
I tried to top that strip club experience.
And because I was now making rap money,
I was starting my career,
I tried to go to all the fly strip clubs.
And the fly strip clubs in this country are in Atlanta
and in Miami and Portland.
Surprisingly, Portland, Oregon, got some--
Portland, Oregon, is that shit.
You know what I'm saying?
But so I was working on my album,
and I booked a ticket--
this story has a lot of valleys and peaks,
so just stay with me.
I booked a ticket to Miami.
Because I'm like, "I'm going to Miami to turn up."
So I get to Miami,
And I knew some girls who were some party girls
and they do all the parties.
And this girl called me; she said, Come to this party.
Are you in Miami?
'Cause I told her I was going to Miami.
She said, Yeah, she said come to this party.
Yeah, I said, "Where's it at?"
She said, It's in the Bahamas.
So I was like-- after some convincing, I went.
And these girls, um, let's just call 'em, um...
Britney and Amber.
They were white girls.
I know those sound like white girl names.
But I'm trying to throw the scent off.
You know what I'm saying?
So Britney and Amber, they invited me to this party,
but they said, "Listen, if you come,
you just gotta follow the rules."
So I was like, "What is this, some, like,
'Eyes Wide Shut' type shit here?"
[laughter] Okay.
So I fly to Bahamas and I get off,
and they tell me that I need to come
to the Peter [bleep] residence.
Now, Peter [bleep] is, like, a textile
super rich billionaire.
You understand what I'm saying? This is a billionaire dude.
And so at first when I first get to the island,
nobody wants to take me there.
They say no one's allowed on the [bleep] property.
I finally convince a driver to take me there.
He drops me off in front,
and I get picked up by one of
Peter [bleep]'s representatives.
He comes in a golf cart to the front of the gates.
The gates was all opulent and decadent
like, "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous."
And I felt like I was in an Ian Fleming/James Bond situation.
You know what I'm saying?
And the guy picks me up-- and the guy who picks me up
is asking me about hip-hop,
and I'm like, "Yeah, I rap.
He's like, "Yeah, I only listen to Frank Sinatra."
You know what I'm saying?
And so immediately I'm starting to feel like,
maybe I'm not in the right place, you know?
And there's, like, spider monkeys.
I'm saying spider monkeys because that sounds official.
I don't know what kind of monkeys they was.
But there was monkeys, you know what I'm saying?
There was peacocks and all types of wildlife.
It was like a two-day, three-day long thing.
I'm staying in this treehouse,
and it's beautiful. It's beautiful.
I had never seen nothing like this.
And I ordered some food, and the guy that brings my food
is a Norwegian guy who says to me,
You know what, Kweli, I saw you perform with Black Star
in Norway back in the day.
And the show that he mentioned was the first time
I had ever been to Norway.
It was me, Hi-Tek, Mos Def,
in some bar in Norway.
It was a small bar--
it was smaller than this bar we in now.
And there was, like, four people in there.
I remember, it was like, four people in this bar,
and this kid in the Bahamas is like, I saw you perform
at that bar in Norway.
And I'm like, wow, okay.
What are you doing here?
He's "I been working here for Peter [bleep].
And, you know, I was like, "Okay, wow.
It made me feel good,
because this is, again, at the beginning of my career.
So then the girls come and I'm hanging out with the girls.
And Britney and Amber and all they friends
and a bunch of other girls.
They finally explain to me what's happening,
and they say, We work for Peter [bleep],
and because we know all the party people,
our job is to invite people here for parties that he has.
And this is his birthday party and it's gonna be a huge party,
and you're gonna be here for the next few days;
it's gonna be fun. And I say, Okay, great.
They say, One rule,
you cannot speak to Peter [bleep], all right?
'Cause they got me fucked up.
They think I'm one of them, you know what I'm saying?
When in my mind, I'm like, "I'm Talib Kweli,"
You know what I'm saying?
I'ma speak to whoever the fuck I feel like speaking to
when I feel like speaking.
So me and the girls have a big argument,
because they feel like I'm about to
mess up they whole situation.
Because I'm just being arrogant about who I am.
And so we're about to have a dinner,
and we find out that he's gonna have a special guest performer
for his birthday party and the special guest performer
is Lionel Richie. All right?
Right? "Dancing on the Ceiling" Lionel Richie, like...
So...
We get to the dinner, and we're all mingling about,
and I had a seat down at the table with the girls.
The table was long. I'm all the way down here with the girls
I came with, and then Peter [bleep],
and his guests are all the way at the front of the table.
And I'm just, I'm playing my role, I'm playing the position.
But Lionel Richie actually shows up, all right?
He shows up, and I get introduced to Lionel Richie
and I could tell that Lionel Richie doesn't know me,
has never heard of me, but because I'm the only other
black male at this event,
he acts like he knows me.
He gives me the black male brother salute.
You know what I'm saying?
I get the whole love like I know Lionel Richie.
So now I'm hanging out with Lionel Richie,
and we know similar people in the music business.
I start talking to him.
And he says, Come sit with me.
So now I'm sitting at the head of the table
with Lionel Richie, and I'm looking
at them girls like, "See, I told you.
I'ma speak when I-- I'm me.
I'm not just here with y'all.
I'm here on my own reconnaissance.
I might be your guest, but I'm also me.
You know what I'm saying?
So we have this beautiful, opulent, wonderful dinner.
And, you know, I'm always the hookup.
I'm always the plug.
I don't know if y'all know, but I smoke pot.
And I won't say that I smoked weed with Lionel Richie.
But after the dinner, we were all hanging out.
And you know, I'm hanging out with Lionel Richie.
I put my pops on the phone with Lionel Richie
because I grew up listening to the Commodores.
You understand what I'm saying?
Like, Lionel Richie is, for my family,
was a huge, huge part of my upbringing.
So Lionel Richie's telling me Commodores stories;
he's telling me Michael Jackson stories.
I put my father on the phone with Lionel Richie.
And I'm feeling good, and because Lionel Richie,
meeting him, reminded me of my childhood,
I went back to my room in the treehouse
and I'm with all these girls,
and it's like, me-- and remember, it was just like,
the dude whose party it was,
Lionel Richie, his wife, and me.
I'm the only dude there.
And it's me and all these girls, and I'm like,
okay, it is time for rapper adult fun.
God damn it.
I'ma have a great time tonight.
But we get into this conversation about family
and I'm explaining to them how much it means
for me to meet Lionel Richie,
and I talk about my father and how I called my father
and I was so proud that I could put my father on the phone
with one of his heroes, Lionel Richie,
and what my kids mean to me.
And one of the girls--
I don't remember if it was Britney or Amber.
One of the girls, all of a sudden at that moment,
remembered that she had a kid.
[laughter]
And she's like, You know what?
I haven't seen my kid in so long.
And I'm out here partying
and I'm out here--my kid.
And she started crying and getting really upset
about the fact that she personally didn't feel like
she was doing enough for her child.
And now, like, the whole romantic sexual vibe
was just...
No more adult fun, all right?
So we end up getting in this whole conversation
about the importance of family,
and then I went to sleep, all right?
So I wake up the next morning,
and I'm still supposed to be there another day,
but when I wake up the next morning,
I wake up to a commotion and I hear yelling and arguing,
and I go downstairs and the kid from Norway, the Norwegian kid,
was arguing with his boss.
And the argument was about the fact he had told him
that he wanted that day off
because it was his wife's birthday.
But they told him that he had to work that day.
And he's like, You know what, you treat me like shit,
you don't take care of me, you don't care about my family,
you know what, fuck y'all. I'm out.
And the kid quits right in front of me.
And in that moment, I think about everything I saw
the night before and all the decadence and all the--
everything that I thought that I wanted to be part of,
but when I saw that the only person there
that knew who I was as an artist,
the only person there who was invested in me
as a person and as an artist
he couldn't even stand to be there no more.
He was leaving, and when he was leaving,
something snapped in my and I'm like, You know what,
as fun as this looks, this is clearly not my scene.
And you know what, maybe I need to leave too.
And I got in the car with that Norwegian kid,
and I went to the airport and I left.
Now, I might have missed out on a lot of fun.
You know what I'm saying?
But the lesson that I took from that is,
your day-ones is your A-ones,
and you should rock with the people who rock with you.
And if you find yourself in a situation
where you're rocking with people who don't really
rock with you, find that one person that rock with you
and maybe leave with them.
Peace, y'all.
[cheers and applause]
- Talib Kweli!
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