Waching daily Aug 3 2017

let's talk about the myth of positive thinking, now the gurus will tell you you should

aim for this magical land where you wake up every day and feel nothing but

positivity where every single thought is positive and you never have any

negativity, now in reality they are probably just trying to sell you some course. So let me give you the truth about positivity, and how to control your

mind in a way that strives for happiness consistently. Now you need to understand

a few flaws in the gurus initial assumptions, the first one is that you can somehow

rewire your primitive mind which is literally wired to seek our problems in

ourself and outside ourselves as a survival mechanism it is constantly

looking for problems so that we can improve so that we can find new ways to

preserve ourself so how can you tell it to be constantly positive when it's

constantly looking for weakness a little bit of positive thinking, a few

little affirmations aren't going to change hundreds of thousands of years of wiring.

okay now the second assumption is that you can control all of your thoughts now

you can't control all 70,000 of your thoughts you have today it's simply not

possible the way I like to think of it is you have a radio in the back of your

mind some days it will pay positive some days it'll play negative now it's up to

you which of those are you buy into that is completely up to you and you have the

power to do so and the third assumption is that any negativity in society must

be a bad thing, no we don't want to have any negativity we must have

positive always, people come home from a long day work and they're not feeling

the best well that's not acceptable here have some cake have a drink

feel better don't sit with that negativity now anytime you run from

negativity on a grander scale perhaps career, relationship ect. The actual intent of running away from that will mean that emotion gets suppressed

and at some point it will come back even harder. So I want you to consider a

few points before I go into some strategies as an alternative and that is

the actual seeking of positivity in negativity is negative and resisting a

thought you don't want will mean it

actually get stronger, trying to avoid thoughts

changes your focus point on to negative and when your focus point is

on negative it means that one thought that wasn't that bad to start with has now

grown into a whole army of negative thoughts. Okay so when you're trying to

be positive trying to strive to that positivity that Nirvana what happens if

you're actually focusing on the negative at the same time and trying to push it away

and then it just comes back stronger. So here are three strategies you can use,

from a bit of an Eastern philosophical approach. The first is

diffusion so how do we diffuse a negative thought, well we have the thought and

rather than let me give you an example for me sometimes I have thoughts of you

know I'm worthless pretty extreme and a lot of people think that I'm always

positive but in reality sometimes I get those thoughts now here's how you defuse

it, you respond to it as hey welcome nice to meet you respond with an almost false

enthusiasm the more you can respond with false enthusiasm the more your mind is

like - look it's not a big deal it's not important for Michael's survival here so

let it go let it pass you're like hey what's up nice of you to visit, not oh why do I

have this thought it's so bad, often in society we're told from the

very young age that any sign of negativity must be terrible must

be bad but in reality it's really not that bad I'm you, know as a kid they told

you hey don't cry be happy as if the kids can flick a switch and all of a

sudden is happy right it's a useless approach the second is present our

presence in the moment so when you focus on the future that tends to generate our

thoughts of anxiety of stress of worry and when you focus on the past you tend

to be depressed miserable now when you learn to focus on the present moment

what is in your current scope of control now you are much happier and as you take

action the third step as you take action in that present moment towards what you

want that is the best means of shifting focus in your mind shifting focus

through all this negative crap going around to what actually matters in the

moment in your action that is how you enable massive problem-solving abilities

as well so I want to leave you with six principles the

can use to manage your thoughts day-to-day almost like a criteria you

can run them through so number one is sortsa merely sounds words stories or

bits of language that's all they are so what's the mail may not be true you

don't automatically believe them thoughts may or may not be important we

pay attention only if that thought is helpful so what they're definitely not

orders we certainly don't have to obey them the thoughts may or may not be wise

we don't automatically follows verify and lastly thoughts are most definitely

not threats

For more infomation >> Why Positive Thinking is the answer - Duration: 5:04.

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Life is Strange: Before the Storm Episode 1 OST | Speedy Ortiz - No below (CC for Lyrics) - Duration: 3:45.

You didn't know me when you were a kid In trouble at school, alone at lunch again

I didn't know you when I broke my knee

Spent the summer on crutches and everybody teased

Except for this one friend I almost forgot

You didn't know me, but he knew me best

The weight of my brain and the fear of my cold head

You never saw me, interred in the ice

My friend tried to melt, but he couldn't thaw me out right

So I got ditched freezing, alone with my thoughts

And though I once said I was better off just being dead

Better off just being dead, without my old friend

True, I once said, I was better off just being dead

But I didn't know you yet

You didn't know me, but you got cold, too

And your mind was heavy, and you thought you might lose it

Well everything fucked up we both felt before

I'm glad for it all if it got us where we are

With you in the boat there, I almost forgot

How I once said I was better off just being dead

Better off just being dead, I didn't know you yet

And you might've said, you were better off just being dead

But I'm looking out for you, my friend, I'm looking

I didn't know you when you were a kid

But swimming with you, it sure feels like I did

For more infomation >> Life is Strange: Before the Storm Episode 1 OST | Speedy Ortiz - No below (CC for Lyrics) - Duration: 3:45.

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Is it dangerous to drink coffee during pregnancy? - Duration: 11:29.

For more infomation >> Is it dangerous to drink coffee during pregnancy? - Duration: 11:29.

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What is Going to a Gender Clinic Like? - Duration: 5:36.

Hey! My name is Gray, and welcome to my channel.

So I've gotten a lot of questions about going to a gender clinic. Now, I know

that's a term that's usually used not in the United States, but I'm using it

because, I mean, I go to the closest thing to a gender clinic here, so it's just

easier to call it that. A lot of people have asked me what kinds of questions

do they ask you at your first appointment, you know, are they kind of

quizzing you or testing you or judging you based on the answers? And you know

just what's it like, really. So today I'm going to tell you a little bit about my

experience. Of course, I can't tell you what your experience is going to be like

because all clinics are different... My camera died um so yeah. All clinics

are different, all doctors are different, so my experience is probably not going

to match yours, but I can tell you what mine was like, so here's some questions

they asked. So if you're nervous about it, maybe just think about what answers you

would give, and even if you're not nervous, it gives you an idea of what

you might be talking about. So the first one is how do you identify? They're going

to ask you a lot about how you currently identify your gender and what that means

to you, so also what pronouns you use and if you aren't currently using the

pronouns that you prefer in life, what pronouns would you prefer, I would say.

And then we talked a lot about dysphoria, so how do you experience dysphoria?

Mild, severe, where on your body you especially experience it, and even

what social situations do you experience it as well? Not the

most fun thing to talk about, but they need to know to help you get the most

out of your transition. And then we talked about how long I've known, so how

long I've identified this way, how long I've been out, what my childhood was like even.

You know, what kind of kid was I in terms of gender, and my mom was there to kind

of corroborate me and my story on that, which is helpful. If your parents are

supportive and remember those kinds of stories, bring them with you, you know, it

always helps to have a second person saying the same thing for some reason, so

yeah, if you have some specific stories from your childhood that you remember

that somehow validate that you were masculine or feminine, use them and again,

we talked about whether I was out or not to friends and family, and in school. They

asked about if I was out in school. Then they asked about support, so where

do I have support? Do I have support from friends? Do I have support from family?

Do I have support from anyone in my life? Luckily I was able to say yes, and again,

I don't know why they asked these questions, but

there's a reason behind all of these. And then the last thing we talked about was

what I'm looking for in transition, so medically, what do I want? Why am I there?

What am I seeking? For me it was hormones, and probably top surgery. For you, it might

be something different, but they wanted to know that way they could get me

resources and kind of plan that for the future. And then my second appointment I

got blood work done, so be aware that that's something that might happen, and

of course, this place kind of doubles as my endocrinologist, so that was probably why they

did the blood work as well. Really good experience. I didn't feel like they were

interrogating me. Don't go into this like an interrogation. Don't feel like you

have to give specific answers. I know we all kind of feel societal pressure to

conform to that trans narrative of, "I've always known. As a kid I was very very

masculine, or for trans women, very feminine," but don't feel forced to give

those answers. If you want to, if you feel like you need

to, fine. That's good, and if your life really fits that narrative, I mean fine,

you know? But don't feel like you need to if that's not the case, you know. Your

validity as a trans person isn't determined by what toys you played with

as a kid. It's determined now by how you feel and how you identify, so... but again,

not all doctors are going to understand that and so if you want to conform to

that narrative as a precaution to ensure that you get the treatment you need, do

what you got to do. Anyway, I hope this helped. Again, this is just my experience, my

views. My name is Gray. Have a wonderful day!